If you’re going to volunteer to be on tv…

… at least get close to proper English.  I’m far from being an English major.  My writing style is proof of that – can’t spell to save my life, misuse commas all the time, and make liberal use of “-” and “…” to cover up my inability to form correct sentences.  (Not a word from ‘the’ grammar Nazi please)  But here are some things I do know:

  • The truck did not spin out into the ‘medium’ – it’s called a ‘median’
  • Don’t use the word “irregardless” – just say “without no regard” and be proud of your double-negative heritage instead of trying to sound smart.
  • Don’t use the word ‘moot’ (and it’s moot not mute) – you don’t actually understand the meaning of the word
  • Stop trying to speak text – the next person that says “Loll” to my face may get hit.  The only exception to this rule is “Berb”

On the subject of texting… if you’re walking into lampposts, just throw your phone in the river.  If you’re not, but you still abbreviate everything… throw it in the river.  Seriously… there should be a “three letter rule” – if you’re not saving at least three letters per word, don’t do it.  “y r u procrastin8ing 2” is not acceptable (acceptable, not exceptable) it takes a normal person more time to translate what you’re saying in their head than you save.

And now that I’ve opened a can of stupid… for the love of all that is holy learn the difference in these:

  • where vs wear
  • its vs it’s
  • there vs they’re vs their

Ok I’m done … my brain hurts just thinking about all the stupid.  Just remember:  half the world population has below average intelligence.

2 thoughts on “If you’re going to volunteer to be on tv…

  1. Where is the editrix? She would be ashamed at your grammer and would further insult you by posting a larger list of words often misused.

  2. I leave you with my blog that was titled “Sometimes You Understand Why People Are Shot” over their Ju-Ree.

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